by Jenna Maddix

Support.

I think that’s the one thing I need the most from others, whether it’s physical (actually being there) or emotional/caring support. This is especially true when it comes to Noah.

There always seems to be something, whether it’s therapies or doctor’s appointments to Noah getting sick. When Noah gets sick, it sticks around longer than for other children. There is always the risk of a hospital stay as well. Recently, Noah has been going through these 2-3 day episodes of vomiting and diarrhea (that hurts) but no fever so I don’t believe it’s a virus.

We are currently trying to figure out what is going on with a gastroenterologist but the cause is still unknown. This means more doctor’s appointments for tests and such until we do find out what’s going on. Due to these ongoing things with Noah, the more support I get, the easier my life can be.

However, that’s not always the case. It’s hard sometimes to get the support I need. For example, this last week when I had to take Noah to the gastroenterologist for this weird sickness he’s been having, I knew I wouldn’t be home when my seven year old daughter got off the bus and no one would be home for her to get in.

I usually get help for things like that from my mother-in-law but she was out of town and a couple of others I tried to help me out, couldn’t. This meant I had to pull her out of school just to make the doctor’s appointment for Noah about 45 minutes away. Even more than physical support, I do wish I had more emotional support.

This is aside from my husband. He does understand because he lives with it too. However, there are times he understands to a point because I usually deal with it directly and I just need to stop stressing out. That can be hard when my son is getting sick over and over again and I don’t know why.

It’s hard not to stress out.

It’s times like this that I really do feel alone. I don’t have that one person to call and just vent, who will understand why I feel the way I do. It just seems as though, even though I feel I’m a relatable person, and I would be there for someone else in a heartbeat, I don’t have many that would do the same for me.

It is hard sometimes when you feel you don’t have anyone to go to, to talk about something Noah is going through and subsequently I am going through.

It would be nice to have that one person to talk it out with or to ask every once in a while, “How’s Noah doing?” Just that little gesture would mean a lot to me. I have my mother. But it’s still hard to talk to her sometimes. She lives 1000 miles away in North Carolina (I’m in Texas) and due to a brain aneurysm she had five years ago, the language barrier can get in the way and I have to explain something several times in different ways for her to understand. I think for special needs parents, support in any way is extremely appreciated and secretly hoped that someone will step up and help or just be there when we need it. No matter what though, I do what needs to be done and always work it out the best way I can.   For Noah.

 

Follow Noah on Twitter, @noahmaddix

Follow Jenna on Twitter, @jennamaddix

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