Life with Lowe: Can’t I Just Get Twenty Minutes of Peace?

May 12, 2016

These shoes were made for walking, but they were made for stopping too.

What do I mean by this?

Well, quite simply, I wish my son would be able to sit still for more than a few minutes at a time and most of the time, that’s only because he’s strapped into a stroller or it wouldn’t last that long.

My son is definitely a sensory seeker. I like that he is always curious, however, there are times when it would be nice to tell Noah to sit in a chair and stay quiet. Even offering my phone or the iPad doesn’t curb this need to get out of the chair and move about. It can be very frustrating.

Recently, my daughter had her second grade school music performance. I’ve been looking forward to it for a few weeks. The theme was Pajama Party. I was excited to watch the whole program with the kids in their pajama’s, in their first official school music program. Ever since my daughter told me she got a speaking part and she’s been singing a few of the songs at home to practice, I have been excited to see it. She loves to perform and I enjoy watching her. She’s been involved with community theatre for over a year and I knew she would do well with her school performance because she enjoys being on stage.

I also knew that we would have to take Noah and he doesn’t sit still for any length of time. I prepared for this and took a few toys (with no noise but lights) he likes and brought the headphones so he could watch Baby Einstein or some kid song videos on YouTube while I watched our daughter’s school performance. The entire show was going to be no longer than 20 minutes and I had hoped I brought enough to keep Noah occupied. The music teacher made her opening remarks and told us to enjoy the show the second graders had worked so hard to put together for us parents. I sat Noah on my lap, started a Baby Einstein video on YouTube and put on his headphones as the first song of the program started. Noah refused to keep the headphones on and immediately wanted off my lap. I pulled out a few toys to try and distract him and that didn’t work either. Nothing I prepared for, to keep Noah entertained and sitting so I could watch the performance, worked.

The ONLY thing he wanted was to walk around the room or go mess with the speaker in the front (he likes the vibration) and I couldn’t let him do that. Mid-way through the first song, Noah started screaming. He was mad he wasn’t allowed to do what he wanted and I knew then, I was going to have to leave. I was that parent with the screaming, uncontrollable child, who couldn’t get him to stay still and quiet. I even made sure he got a nice, long nap before the evening program and that still didn’t help.

Before the first song was over, I had to take Noah out of the room, put him back in his stroller and go outside. I tried to stay by the door, with my head peaked in and at least see a little of the program. Especially knowing my daughter would be doing her speaking part soon. She was the first to speak in the program. However, Noah couldn’t even let me do that. As soon as I stopped the stroller and opened the door a little (and low and behold, Isabella was coming to the mic at that moment), Noah started screaming again to get out of the stroller. I closed the door and took him out so he could walk the sidewalk outside. I started crying. I was so mad at Noah in that moment. I only wanted 20 minutes to see my daughter perform and he couldn’t give that to me. Fortunately, my husband did record it (we have a videography business) so that I could still see it later. I ended up taking Noah and putting him back in the car and waited for the program to be over. I didn’t want other parents who happened to walk in late or come out to see me crying so I felt it was best to go back to the car and wait.

I am also very fortunate that Isabella understood. I was expecting her to get upset the way I had that I missed her first school performance. She simply said, “It’s OK mom. Daddy got it recorded. We can watch it together later.” I gave her a huge hug and told her I loved her and knew she did amazing. She was amazing in that moment too.

I am still on the waiting list to Noah get behavioral therapy. Currently, he may get in at some point this summer. I am anxious to see if this kind of therapy will help in situations like this. I’m desperate. It’s getting to a point where it’s hard to take him anywhere and Noah not have a meltdown over something small…like staying in the cart and stop trying to get out, or his obsession with the car speaker and as soon as I take him out of his car seat, he wants me to put him down so he can touch the speaker (with or without music playing) and throws a fit when I don’t let him. Sometimes I give in and do but no amount of time is good enough. As soon as I take him away from it, the meltdown begins.


Follow Noah on Twitter, @noahmaddix

Follow Jenna on Twitter, @jennamaddix

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